What Women Want

Quickie little post, reporting some findings from work.

Radio stations who use our firm for music research have the option to include extra questions in their surveys, usually things like "How do you like our morning show?" This week, one of our stations decided to ask their (all-female) survey respondents "What do you want for Valentine's Day?" They can type in anything they want, though many answers fall into common categories. Here's a summary of the responses so far:

What the hell, ladies? FLOWERS? Flowers are useless! They're just vegetables you can't eat, slowly dying on your kitchen table and shedding their dead husks on your household surfaces. Stop asking for flowers. THEY ARE A TERRIBLE GIFT.

There's a hell of a lot of variation in the data, supporting the assertion that women are individuals with distinct desires and interests rather than a homogenous mass of shrieking harpies. Heck, the various "other" answers wound up being the second-largest category. Tech gifts (ladies asking for an iPhone, a tablet, etc) were common, as was the wry "a boyfriend." A fair number of respondents asked for immaterial gifts like "an evening alone with my lover" or "a hug and a kiss," in dreamy opposition to the contingent of pragmatists with answers like "diamonds" or "a thousand dollars." Some highlights from the "others" category: A paddle board, cake, a handbag, promise rings (strangely pluralized), and a swatch watch.

So now you know exactly what to get your honey for V-Day: tons of flowers, an iPad, mutliple promise rings (one for each relevant orifice?) and a colorful watch from the eighties.